Episode 40Feb 16, 2026· 6:07

I'm Losing Weight But I Still Don't Love My Body (Here's What I'm Doing About It)

▸ Show notes from the creator

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About this episode

Ashley Grant reflects honestly on Valentine's Day about the gap between losing weight and actually loving her body — she's dropped multiple pant sizes but still sees her former self in the mirror. She describes finding moments of body appreciation through physical capability (completing hard workouts, getting stronger, gaining flexibility) rather than appearance. She also shares an unexpected development: starting…

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Who this episode is for

This episode may resonate with you if:

You've lost weight or changed your body and expected to finally feel good about yourself — but you still look in the mirror and see the same person you've always been uncomfortable with.

You've been telling yourself you'll work on your mental and emotional stuff eventually — but you've been quietly avoiding it for years and don't fully understand why.

You're somewhere in the middle of a health journey and the results are real, but the self-love people told you would come hasn't arrived yet and you're not sure it ever will.

The only moments you feel okay about your body are when it's actually doing something hard — lifting, finishing a tough workout — not when you're just standing still looking at it.

You've started taking better care of yourself physically and it's unexpectedly dredging up old pain — things you thought you'd buried — and you're not sure whether to be grateful or overwhelmed.

Questions this episode wrestles with

Why don't I feel better about my body even though I'm losing weight?

open question

Ashley sits with this directly — dropping pant sizes hasn't changed what she sees in the mirror, and she doesn't offer a resolution, just names it as something she's still working through.

"three pant sizes. I still look in the mirror and I still see that formerly fat girl. I really do. And so I'm working on the self -love aspect, but I'm not there yet. I'm you know, it's a I'm"

Does the way you see yourself in the mirror ever actually change?

open question

Ashley doesn't claim it has changed for her yet — she describes it as an ongoing process of trying to accept what she's looking at, not a transformation that's happened.

"trying to accept what is what I'm looking at. And so, no, I'm not I'm not feeling that body love that I want to feel. But I am loving the"

Can you build self-love through fitness if you don't love your body yet?

answered

Ashley shares that she finds moments of body love through what her body can do — finishing a hard rep, getting through a strenuous workout — and believes that the more she keeps showing up and getting stronger, the more self-love will follow.

"to handle it. And so I feel like the more that I keep showing up and the more that I keep getting stronger, the more that I'll start having that"

Why is getting healthy bringing up old trauma instead of making me feel better?

open question

Ashley notices this happening to her — starting to take care of her body has surfaced trauma and emotional issues she had long repressed — but she can't explain why, and she literally asks listeners to send her a voice note if they can explain the psychology.

"hadn't started working on my fitness. And I think"

Setting expectations: This episode is not a guide to body positivity or a success story about how weight loss led to self-love. It's Ashley talking honestly on Valentine's Day about still seeing 'that formerly fat girl' in the mirror despite dropping pant sizes, and not having figured it out yet.

Tensions inside this episode

Moments where Famous Ashley Grant names something — and contradicts it inside the same episode. Both quotes are verbatim from the transcript.

Working on self-love, treating Ashley better

Ashley frames the episode around actively working toward self-love and body acceptance, yet admits she still looks in the mirror and sees 'that formerly fat girl' despite dropping multiple pant sizes.

Claim

"-love thing, I'm working on treating Ashley better. I'm working more on falling in love with who I am as a person. And I do feel more confident"

but

Contradiction

"and I still see that formerly fat girl. I really"

Tone & style

Ashley starts from the assumption that losing weight would bring body love, gets asked by listeners how she's feeling now that she's dropping sizes, and has to admit the feeling hasn't arrived — she still sees her former self in the mirror. The turning point is realizing she does feel love for her body, but only in moments of physical capability (finishing a hard rep, getting through a strenuous workout), not from looking at her appearance. Fitness has also unexpectedly surfaced repressed trauma she'd long buried. The episode ends unresolved — she's still working on treating Ashley better and hasn't gotten there yet.

Personal experience and self-reflection shared in real time. Ashley explicitly says she's a work in progress and doesn't know the psychology behind what she's experiencing.

toneRaw & unresolved

focusAshley admitting, on Valentine's Day, that dropping pant sizes hasn't made her love her body — and that she still sees 'that formerly fat girl' in the mirror.

stylepersonal_confession

energymedium_low

complexitybeginner

pressure Levellow

emotional Texturevulnerable, honest, unresolved, quietly hopeful

Notable quotes

"and I still see that formerly fat girl. I really"

— Famous Ashley Grant

"Those are the times that I love my body the most because I get so excited that my body was able"

— Famous Ashley Grant

"because of the fact I'm finally facing things with fitness, I'm able to face things mentally and emotionally. I don't know if that'll make"

— Famous Ashley Grant

Episode transcript

Organized into 4 chapters — open any part to read the full text.

0:001. Still Seeing the 'Formerly Fat Girl' in the MirrorAshley responds to listener questions about how she feels now that she's losing weight, admitting she still doesn't love her body and still sees her former self in the mirror despite dropping pant sizes.2:432. Finding Body Love Through Strength, Not AppearanceAshley describes the specific moments she does feel love for her body — completing hard reps, getting through strenuous workouts — and connects showing up consistently to slowly building confidence.3:283. Fitness Opening Up Repressed Mental and Emotional StuffAshley reflects on how working on her fitness has unexpectedly surfaced trauma and emotional issues she had long repressed, and says she's grateful for it even when it hurts.4:484. Working on Treating Ashley BetterAshley wraps up by saying she's still a work in progress on self-love, closes with a Valentine's Day message, and invites listeners to send voice notes.

Open full transcript

Mentioned in this episode

websitefamousashleygrant.com/fitness

Ashley's website where she invites listeners to send her voice notes with questions or comments about her fitness journey.

Key themes

Still seeing the 'formerly fat girl' in the mirror

Despite dropping two or three pant sizes, Ashley says she still looks in the mirror and sees her former self, and hasn't arrived at body love yet.

Weight loss not automatically producing self-love

Ashley pushes back on the implied assumption in listener questions that losing weight would make her love her body, saying the two things aren't the same for her.

Loving the body through what it can do, not how it looks

Ashley says the moments she feels most love for her body are when she completes a hard rep or gets through a strenuous workout, not when she looks in the mirror.

Fitness surfacing repressed trauma and emotional stuff

Ashley reflects that working on her physical fitness has unexpectedly opened up mental and emotional issues she had hidden away for a long time, and she's grateful even when it hurts.

The gym as the one place the brain clears

Ashley describes being at the gym as the one time everything gets clear and her brain opens up, which she connects to why emotional things are coming to the surface.

Self-love as a work in progress, not a destination

Ashley frames herself as a human work in progress on self-love, repeatedly saying she's not there yet but is actively working on treating herself better.

Treating Ashley better — grace after years of not being mindful

Ashley acknowledges she didn't treat her body well for many years and says she's now starting to give herself more grace, which is helping with confidence.

Confidence growing through showing up, not through the scale

Ashley connects her growing confidence not to the weight she's lost but to the act of consistently showing up and getting stronger.

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