Episode 0Jul 15, 2026· 12:33

What a Kidney Stone Taught Me About Relationships

▸ Show notes from the creator

What could a kidney stone possibly teach us about relationships? More than I ever would have expected if you had asked me a month ago. In this episode, I share a few surprising lessons that came from the most difficult (and most recent) medical experience of my life. Send us Fan Mail Email CT: [email protected] Connect on social: @TheMindfulSPX Check out our website: TheMindfulSPX.com

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About this episode

CT Kaupp shares a personal account of getting his first kidney stone — ER visit alone at 11pm, a 5mm stone, surgery, and a post-procedure stint — and reflects on what the experience revealed about relationships, friendship, and priorities. Topics include using humor and levity with medical staff during a health crisis, how physical pain strips away external noise like social media and work anxiety, the difference…

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Who this episode is for

This episode may resonate with you if:

You've been through something physically scary alone — an ER visit, a diagnosis, a procedure — and you're quietly processing which people in your life actually showed up and which ones didn't.

Someone in your life responded to your pain with something cold or dismissive — a thumbs-up, a one-word reply, silence — and you're sitting with the sting of that, trying to figure out what it means.

You've been caught up in the noise — social media, work stress, whether someone texted back — and some part of you knows none of it actually matters, but you can't seem to stop caring about it.

You use humor to get through hard things, and you've wondered whether that's a coping mechanism or just genuinely who you are — and whether the people around you actually appreciate it.

You're starting to realize that a relationship — friendship, romantic, whatever — isn't as mutual as you thought, and a recent moment made that impossible to ignore.

Questions this episode wrestles with

How do you know who your real friends are?

answered

CT shares that a medical emergency revealed it fast — one person he knew only at a surface level texted him during the kidney stone ordeal and responded to 'I have a kidney stone' with a thumbs-up emoji, which CT describes as 'kind of hilarious, but then sad at the same time, like just zero empathy.'

"responded with was a thumbs up emoji, which"

Does a crisis actually reveal who cares about you, or is that just something people say?

answered

CT's experience is that it does reveal it — he noticed who checked in, who came to surprise him, and who faded away, and describes the kidney stone as having 'brought to light' who 'naturally stepped forward and was present in those moments and who faded away and kind of showed their true colors.'

"definitely having the kidney stone brought to light"

Why does it take something going wrong to see what you actually care about?

answered

CT reflects that physical pain forces it — your world gets small and all the external noise drops away, so you stop thinking about Instagram or work or whether someone texted back, and you're left with only what truly matters.

"You're not thinking about Instagram, you're not thinking"

When someone disappoints you during a hard time, does that tell you something new or confirm what you already knew?

answered

CT's take is that it mostly confirms what you already knew — you probably would have gotten there eventually, but the crisis 'just compounds it, kind of puts it on hyperspeed to show you who's really gonna be there.'

"probably would have gotten to that conclusion that"

Setting expectations: This episode is not about kidney stone prevention, medical advice, or a structured framework for evaluating your relationships. It's CT talking through a rough month — ER visits, surgery, a stint, the World Cup on TV — and what he noticed about himself and the people around him while he was in pain.

Tone & style

CT starts from ordinary life with its social media noise and surface-level connections, gets forced into the ER alone at 11pm with a kidney stone, and finds that physical pain strips everything external away — leaving only the desire to feel okay and a sharp clarity about who actually shows up. The episode ends on a resolved note: crisis put his relationships 'on hyperspeed,' and he frames that as a clarifying, if painful, gift.

Personal experience and self-reflection from a recent medical event. Not relationship advice or medical guidance.

toneCandid & warm

focusWhat a kidney stone — the ER, the surgery, the thumbs-up emoji — revealed to CT about which relationships are real and what actually matters when everything else falls away.

stylesolo_monologue

energymedium_low

complexitybeginner

pressure Levellow

emotional Texturehonest, self-aware, lightly humorous, quietly vulnerable

Notable quotes

"You're not thinking about Instagram, you're not thinking"

— CT Kaupp

"hilarious, but then sad at the same time,"

— CT Kaupp

"having this kind of experience then just compounds"

— CT Kaupp

"take my mind off the craziness that's going"

— CT Kaupp

Episode transcript

4 chapters — tap to expand the full text

CT describes getting his first kidney stone, ending up in the ER alone at 11pm, learning he had a 5mm stone, and eventually needing surgery followed by a stint — calling it the most insane medical month of his life.